Tell us your worst drunk story!

[TheRo0sTer]

Ok mine started at a party at friends house back in Sunny California! I just drove back home from Vegas to visit some friends. Well we started with a couple of cases of beer. A few days earlier I learned how to make a drink called a machine (called other names too) you pour your shot in, take a rage push into the glass till it meets the alcohol then pour you chaser in slowly, slowly remove the rag and you have a seperated drink! Anyhow we did enough to kill a gallon of Vodka and a fifth or Tequilla! I met a chick there and was making out with her. She left to got to the toilet and I puked in my mates mothers plant! Wipped my mouth and she comes back and I slam my tounge back down her throat! We decide to go outside and do some rolling around by the pool. She gets up and ask me to go to the room with here. Like a dumb drunk I stand up with both hands in my pockets and fall flat on my face! Waking up the next morning with my face stuck to the pillow I go wake my mate up and he takes one look at me and says "Dood what happened to your face?" I didn't know thats why was waking him up! Took the embarassement of meeting that chick again to get the story from her! Needless to say I didn't get laid that night! Oh well lets here yours!

 

[Al Woods]

2 things dude

One, you gotta go to our site and post up in the OUTPOST the instructions to mix the drink THE MACHINE, then, the next time we meet (maybe Elsham) we gotta re-invent a drink that is blue called the K2 MACHINE, sound good?

Boozy stories?? Mmmmm. Once went to a club at Park Hall near Camelot (Charnock Richard) when I was at college and had one or two drinks. First fun of the night? One of my friends wore sneaks, guess what, no sneaks allowed so he ordered a taxi to pick up shoes from his house in Preston and bring them to the club THEN take his sneaks back to his house. Cost? About £35 (ish) Next we all get fuzzy as hell and when we go outside I hear "get down Al, you gonna get us all in sh1t man" 'coz I was dancing on the rooves of all the cars in the hotel car park, BMWs-Jaguars-Mercs etc...you get the picture, I then slip and nearly go through the sunroof of one car, can't remember what kind. Next up we sit near the lakeside waithing for a taxi home and there are these HUGE boulders scattered around, "who reckons they can pick one o' these up?" yeah who's the clever man now?? Me of course, so I'm lifting and pulling and tugging at this rock then I slip and just roll over the top of this boulder, on my face, and land head first in a bunch o' gravel. My eyebrow, cheekbone, cheek, lip and chin are all bleeding now and I look like I've been beaten by Mike Tyson so we then walk into the lobby of this hotel to ring ANOTHER taxi, don'y know why, and the DJ's are sittin' there drinking loads of beer so I go over, with my face hanging off, and start to help myself to their beer on the table. They didn't say anything, believe it or not.

That's an old one, but a goodie.

 

[QuikSilver]

Ah, this is gonna be a good one. Buddha get in here!

As for the worst? Well once when I was very very drunk, I decided I could jump out of a 2 story window - why? Who knows, I can't remember that night too well.

And another time I lit my legs on fire and ran into the ocean laughing me ass off

I'm sure there's worst, I can't remember a lot of my endeavors in stupidity. You know... the nights you only know about by people coming up to you all that week and telling you stories of what you've done

 

[Buddha 3]

God, I've been drunk many a time.........
One of the weirdest ones must have been a while ago. I know I was hammered, but I was still in control(ish).I did the usual stupid drunken stuff like fall down the stairs and break the sofa (luckily it wasn't at my place), I was even smart enough to think to myself 'I really should go home now...'
The next thing I remember after thinking that is waking up the next morning in my bed. My face was glued to the pillow with what turned out to be a mixture of vomit, mud, and blood. When I went to the bathroom to have the mandatory 5 minute leak after a night out, I saw that my face and shoulders were covered in the same glue like mixture. Also, I had made a surprisingly well organised barricade in front of the bedroom door, using almost all the clothes I have in my closet. Why I did that, I have no idea, but I must have been scared of something................
Worst bit is that I had to work that day.................ouch!

 

[Alien]

Roasting our front player at a team get together.......
Using the rope swing in the dark while to blitzed to care.......
Putting our front player on top of some cable drums and setting fire to them...
Chasing a friend of mine round the paintball site while trying to hit him with a baseball bat......
Jousting on kids toys.......
Chasing our tape player around till i fell over braking my hand, then playing the following day at a tourny

After looking at this lot i better give up drinking

or attending team get togethers, someones gonna get hurt

There may be more but i cant remember them

Alien

 

[Collier]

K I'll tell this story how I saw it,

Went out with my mates had lots of stella, came back to my flat which I shared with my (ex)girlfriend, had a few glass's of wine, sat on my armchair then I needed a piss I went up to the loo, too pissed to stand up so dropped my trousers and boxers, sat down had a piss. woke up the next morning in bed, tried to cuddle up to Kim and she pushed me away
Me 'what the ****? whats wrong?"
Kim "you, you muppet"
Me" what am I not allowed to get pissed now?"
Kim "Do you not remember anything??"
Feeling of dread swept over me I looked around the room...
Me "why's the cover off the armchair?"
Kim".....you pissed on it! I came into the lounge and you were sat on the armchair with your trouser's and boxer's round your ankles, I lifted you up and there was a pool of piss!"
Me.......................brawlffffff!!!"

Lovely

Paul.

 

[thebestthereis]

My worst time has to be at a mates house, we decided it was to much effort to go out and did shots at his. We got very mashed and ended up collapsing out to sleep at about three in the morning, being a natural person I tend to sleep as nature intended. Being drunk at the time when the doorbell rang I got up and went to answer the door only to find it was his parents returning from a night out and I had forget to get dressed! For any one who knows me this is not a pretty sight

later chris

 

[steve_e]

As with Buddha i've been drunk a few too many times to remember all but. . . one of my more recent exploits took place in Preston for a Birthday celebration with a bunch of students, all the girls were in fancy dress, me being <cough> a few <cough> years older I seem to take the decision to out drink them all!!

So on arrival down a few beers, next nearly 1/2 bottle of vodka and on to the pub. . .on to the double JD's and coke .. .. .. things got a bit blurry from here onwards!

Apparently my mate had a bit of moment, which i apparently had gave some good advice and put it all right. . . . we caught a taxi to a club and partied hard til kick out time (apparently i was a bit of a demon on the dance floor! ).

Lost everyone in a chippy (it's possible!), then caught a taxi back to the house. . . after a few more drinks some of the girls decided to go, with me sniffing around spying a possible shag and being asked if I wanted go back for a smoke how could i refuse! i don't know how but I agreed to give this one girl a piggy back home so at 2ish in the morning a pissed up guy could be seen with an angel on his back running down the street! Whilst in mid piggy back I said something (don't know what!) which gave the response of 'i've got a boyfriend' , i resisted the temptation to drop her there and then! I do recall chillin cabbaged on the settee. . . .The next thing I woking up wondering where the f*** I was!

Apparently I returned to the house at around 4am..... this story has been put together with flashbacks and other peoples input!!

Moral of story I can still out drink students!!

 

[Collier]

Thinking bout it, (I try to forget...damnit I try!!!) any night with the 'pimps is a nominee for a 'worst drunk story thread'

Paul.

 

[steve_e]

oh yeaaaaah

at one of the pimps team piss ups, i decided it was time to hit the sack, an inflatable mattress in the back of my car..... unfortunately I'd forgot to inflate it before the drinking had started, so my drunken intelligence gave me an idea!! inflate it using my dive tank! I lived to tell the tale and it didn't explode so hey!!!!