Right I'm gonna win this one....
Try crawling through a ditch full of durty, stagnent, Ice-cold water. Almost catching pneomineia[or how ever you spell it] and then discovering that you have got a water infection.
Hence a dick swollen to twice its size and a constant itching sensation, with the added bonus of a sharp stinging when ever i drain the lizard.
The swelling was quite interesting its the pain that does your head in, and all this for a bit of fun running around the woods