Toulouse - A real story !!!

[Russell Smith]

A domestic question

Why are womens feet smaller than mens ?







So they can get closer to the kitchen sink .






Now if you laughed at any of the above, You must post a joke for the rest of us to enjoy.
Also come on girls there is a load of men jokes, So start posting !

 

[Mark Toye-Nexus]

Cant help it

What's the difference between a blond and a washing machine??






A washing machine won't follow you around after you dump your load in it!!!!!

Jeez that's going to set a new tone - and probably get me scolded!!!

Mark

 

[Buddha 3]

how can you tell if a blonde's been working on a computer?


the screen's covered in white-out........

 

[RobJenkins]

How can you tell a blonde's been in a car?
The gear stick is moist.

What's the difference between a blonde an a ironing board?
An ironing board's legs are easier to close.

What's similiar about a blonde an a turtle?
Once they're on their backs they're f**ked.

Any More???

Rob

 

[JonBon (Bonich)]

I liked the jokes, mine are a little more distasteful, whad'ya think.
Mark T, you said yours would set a new tone, these blow it all away. (no pun intended )

Q. How do you know when your sister is on the blob?

A. By the taste of your dads c**k!


Daughter asks dad to lend her some money for a dress for a party,( she wants
to impress her boy friend)

He agrees, but she has to suck his c**k first, ..She unwillingly agrees (as
she wants this dress to impress her boy friend)

As she clamps her lips around his bulb, she reels back in disgust, and says"Urgh ...Your c**k tastes like sh*t!"

He says " I know, your brother wanted to borrow the car!!)

Q. Why do woman bleed once a month?

A. I dunno?.... and any way who cares!?


I had a go at my wife the other day, about the mess in the Kitchen especially the sink it was full ...of plates tea cups and cutlery!!!
I told her how inconsiderate she was, I had to go upstairs to the bathroom to have a sh*t!

Oh dear, they were a bit near the mark , can any one top them??
Go on I dear you!

 

[UKRedskin2001]

yeah i can top all those in one word...



pyjamas



funny eh?

 

[Russell Smith]

I do not believe it

Oh God John,
I said lets have a giggle when you sent me your jokes by em I did not think for one second you would post them on here.
However since you have now contaminated the minds of those nice people who peruse these boards looking for some witty banter, It is only appropriate that one attempt's to direct the blame for such a disgusting lack of respect for the feeling of your fellow paintballers away from you dear sir and to the person who we feel is responsible.
A person I may add can only be discribed as perfidious, A person who on a least two occasion's has i believed complained on this very forum people were being to nice and respectfull to each other.
A person I believe who as you read this very posting is trying to radiate a benign sense of friendship.
And who you may be asking yourself do I refer to, Is it the gay man of magland the alien life form himself although i think you spend an unnatural amount of time together and I'm sure he has introduced you acts of debauchery he is not the person to blame this time!.
Is it the big man of the north!, In this particular case I have spoke to the man and he says until he has proof that you did not post those sick jokes while in full control of your faculty's the BullyBon roadshow is canceled untill further notice, And he himself is having to take solace in his nearest pieshop.
No the person responsible for the dastly deed is none other than the man himself MillsEy yes thats right MilsEy.
I think he has come into possession of a mind control device and using the same to control our fixer of things not broken to do what he can not do since we changed boards and that is of course to cause upset and conflict.
Well you have been warned milsEy we know the game you are playing and are sending by next day delivery two gallons of holy water with instructions to johns wife to sprinkle some round the doors to bar your admitance to his abode and the rest she can use to wash the pots so Mr quantum can **** downstairs.

 

[Sid]

Women

Why did God give women legs??

Have you seen the mess Snails make


Why did God invent women??


Cos Sheep can't cook


Why did God invent Men (one for the ladies)??

Cos Vibrators can't buy a round

 

[UKRedskin2001]

Originally posted by JonBon (Bonich)

Go on I dear you!

you DEAR me oh dear god no, he dears me, well at least he isnt dareing me to do anyhing.

 

[JanSolo]

Another Blonde Joke

How do you know if a blonde has no knickers on?





There's dandruff on her shoes.


hee hee.

Jan.