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New girlfriend wanted

Chicago

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Jan 31, 2005
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Surely Stan you are not this dense. The explanation is obvious.

Let's assume for a minute that your girlfriend has a particular hobby, for the case of illustration, we'll say it's bridge. She loves bridge, she travels around to play bridge, loves bridge tournaments. You know how to play birdge, don't mind an occasional game of bridge, but spending all day watching bridge is like watching paint dry to you.

You suggest that you take a trip to Vegas, because, well, Vegas rocks. Your girlfriend comes back to you later and says "Well, the weather in Vegas sucks when you want to go there, so let's go to San Diego. Oh, and there just HAPPENS to be a big bridge tournament there that weekend."

Com'on, do you really think your girlfriend wants to get on a plane, travel across an ocean, and go to a paintball tournament? Based on a lame excuse like "The weather sucks in the Maldives"?

My wife is OK with paintball. She goes to tournaments, she plays some, but it' not HER hobby. She has her own hobby, which takes up her time as well, and we're both cool with doing our hobbies on our time, but if I scheduled our vacation to coincide with a paintball tournament (or she scheduled our vacation to coincide with her hobby) there would be problems.

Sorry man, the problem here is you.
 

mikey601

F orum Battle Organiser
Nov 23, 2005
5,189
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Originally posted by Chicago
Surely Stan you are not this dense. The explanation is obvious.

Let's assume for a minute that your girlfriend has a particular hobby, for the case of illustration, we'll say it's bridge. She loves bridge, she travels around to play bridge, loves bridge tournaments. You know how to play birdge, don't mind an occasional game of bridge, but spending all day watching bridge is like watching paint dry to you.

You suggest that you take a trip to Vegas, because, well, Vegas rocks. Your girlfriend comes back to you later and says "Well, the weather in Vegas sucks when you want to go there, so let's go to San Diego. Oh, and there just HAPPENS to be a big bridge tournament there that weekend."

Com'on, do you really think your girlfriend wants to get on a plane, travel across an ocean, and go to a paintball tournament? Based on a lame excuse like "The weather sucks in the Maldives"?

My wife is OK with paintball. She goes to tournaments, she plays some, but it' not HER hobby. She has her own hobby, which takes up her time as well, and we're both cool with doing our hobbies on our time, but if I scheduled our vacation to coincide with a paintball tournament (or she scheduled our vacation to coincide with her hobby) there would be problems.

Sorry man, the problem here is you.
What would be worse, having a girlfriend who didnt like paintball or having a girlfriend that plays bridge!!!:confused:

Of all the hobbies out there you pick bridge....
 

Baca Loco

Ex-Fun Police
Pay no attention to Chi-town, Stan, the answer to your problems is either money or violence. Tell her there are beaches and large international shopping malls a few minutes from the tourney site and hand over the credit cards. If that ain't an option a rubber truncheon to the bottom of the feet (no obvious bruising) should do the trick nicely and she'll be grateful for bleachers to sit down on.
 

Stan

Platinum Member
Jul 18, 2001
2,134
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Originally posted by Baca Loco
Pay no attention to Chi-town, Stan, the answer to your problems is either money or violence. Tell her there are beaches and large international shopping malls a few minutes from the tourney site and hand over the credit cards. If that ain't an option a rubber truncheon to the bottom of the feet (no obvious bruising) should do the trick nicely and she'll be grateful for bleachers to sit down on.
Spoken like a true gent:D
 

Equinox

Go Ball Deep!!!
Originally posted by Stan
Spoken like a true gent:D
its nice to see chivalry hasn't died... :D

To the O.P..

the answer to your problems is easy..

1:- Next time your down the local gym.. when someone is in the shower, steal his smelly sweaty boxer shorts..

WARNING :- DO NOT GET CAUGHT DOING THIS!!! AS BEING CAUGHT RED HANDED STEALING MENS SWEATY UNDIES CAN SERIOUSLY DAMAGE YOUR SELF ESTEEM AND DESTROY YOUR PRIDE AND DIGNITY!!! AND IS SCIENTIFICLY LINKED TO SELF LOATHING!!

2:- Arrange a night where you have to be away from home
for some reason, EG:- your m8s budgie died from syphalis.
and hes inconsolable and near suicide!!!

NOTE:- in retrospect.. the "tragic budgie death" may seem a little
stupid, and unbelievable... say... his cat died from space measels!

3:- Come home.. tell missus how much you missed her and hated spending a night apart.. and get all set for a romantic night in...
Plant the now festering stolen undies, skidmarks and all, in her favorite vibrator hiding spot.. (and no.. thats not "in her")

ADVICE :- Offer to get out the gimp suit and strawberry jam..
this should really get her wet!!!

4:- in the middle of your "romantic gimp episode" find said undies.. let your bottom lip quivver for about 10 seconds and weep like a four year old girl!!!!

5:- Leave her as you cannot believe how she could two time you in your own home when your gone for just one night..

6:- Go to Florida.. go to the NPPL.. have your way with some Fit american bird in a "spite of revenge" against the now ex-missus..
Have several if it makes you feel better.. :D (there are certain pharmacutical aids that help if your ugly!!)

7:- Go back home.. a satisfied man!! tell her that you missed her even though shes cheaper than Asdas.. and tell her you forgive her.. and want her back!!!

8:- Live happily ever after...

The End...

Problem solved!!
 

Candy

#23
Dec 13, 2005
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quote:
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Originally posted by lump
you think you got it bad ! check this out,i have been playing for 4 years,meet my missus last year,she got hooked on ball,what does she get for crimbo a pink nexus ego,shes on the front cover of PBUK and is fcuking of to latvia without me tomorrow ? so wheres the justice in that.
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aaah thats not nice now is it although good luck to the angels!Guys, i have probs with finding boys that are prepared to put up with me playing pball nearly every weekend (so some girl ballers do get the same problem as you guys!) and it cost me a boyfriend in the end but then i started to date a baller, it worked fine, we both played and trained whenever and it never caused an arguement even though we play for rival teams!Although i suppose we were just lucky that seeing each other was not a problem when it come to paintball...Good luck!