A scarlet visionary = Sergei
a man... the size of Northamptonshire... = Robbo
another visionary atop a colored eagle = ok, I will go with Dave Dehaan, too
Whilst this is going on, 'un homme' is planning the deal of deals in exotic lands with exotic aliens aiming for exotic heights = Laurent is going to Aruba to get that crazy paintball lovin' Aruba owning millionaire to bankroll the newest scheme
Washington xx = DC, ie Dick Clark
All the while, the sport of sports (paintball has many faces (formats) but everybody knows it has to have only one recognition (one successful TV breakthrough) but.......which face (format), which body (league) and if the two main rivers (PSP and NPPL) join or not
one eyed short ass emulating his namesake = more allusion to Dick Clark, maybe?
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So Sergei and Robbo and Dave Dehaan get together to launch some dastardly plan that will be finaced by that Aruba guy and will make Dick Clark feel stupid for bailing. It doesn't matter what format or league makes it, so long as Paintball gets mainstream visibility enough to justify mainstream sponsorship (advertising), in fact, this sucker is so big who even cares if the NPPL and PSP reunite? There will be cake for everyone when the pieces come to rest.
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So long as there's rabbits, George.