Go and buy £50 worth of matt black spray from halfords.
Don't mask anything.
Spray everything. .........(except windows and lights obviously)
http://rides.webshots.com/photo/1076294042036089359hDwBTI
You then have a rat look car that you'll never have to wash again.
A car that no-one will argue with.
A car that no-one will park next too
A car that no-one will steal
And a paintjob that can be retouched for £5.99
Perfect