Lets talk about M&M's shall we.
whenever i get a pack of plain M&M's, i make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species. to this end, i hold M&M duels. taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger, i apply pressure, squeezing them together until pone of themcracks and splinters. the winner gets to go another round.
i have found that, in general, the brown and the red M&M's are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue M&M's as a race cannot survive long in the intense theatre of competition that is the modern candy and snack food world.
Occasionally i will get a mutation, a candy that is mishapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the candy extra strength. in this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment.
when i reach the end of the pack, i am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, i pack it in an envelopeand send it to :
M&M mars. a division of Mars inc.
Hackettstown, NJ 17840-1503 U.S.A.
alond with a 3x5 cards reading:
"please use this M&M for breeding purposes."
this week they wrote back to thank me, and sent me a coupon for a free 1/2 pound bag of plain M&M's. i consider this "grant money." i have set aside the weekend for a grand tournament. from a field of hundreds, we will discover the true champion.
There can be only one
whenever i get a pack of plain M&M's, i make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species. to this end, i hold M&M duels. taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger, i apply pressure, squeezing them together until pone of themcracks and splinters. the winner gets to go another round.
i have found that, in general, the brown and the red M&M's are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue M&M's as a race cannot survive long in the intense theatre of competition that is the modern candy and snack food world.
Occasionally i will get a mutation, a candy that is mishapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the candy extra strength. in this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment.
when i reach the end of the pack, i am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, i pack it in an envelopeand send it to :
M&M mars. a division of Mars inc.
Hackettstown, NJ 17840-1503 U.S.A.
alond with a 3x5 cards reading:
"please use this M&M for breeding purposes."
this week they wrote back to thank me, and sent me a coupon for a free 1/2 pound bag of plain M&M's. i consider this "grant money." i have set aside the weekend for a grand tournament. from a field of hundreds, we will discover the true champion.
There can be only one
