Fake an old war wound. Works wonders for me.
Jay, far be it from me to cast any inappropriate aspersions in your direction mate, after all, you are a friend of mine and just as importantly, a lot bigger
But...after looking at your sig pic, it sorta strikes me that you could be a little preoccupied; you seem to be looking, or at least extremely interested in something that is to the right of you ... now, if that something is female(hopefully), then what slightly concerns me, is the position of your hands, which consequently provokes the question as to what they are doing .... I shall say no more for fear of my skull being crushed