Whhhhooaaaa there TJ, I've easily got that beat.
1 - A 3 cassette set entitled "3 Steps to Guitar Heaven" (inc, that all important first lesson in how to hold your guitar correctly... that over the shoulder thing looks kinda tricky)
2 - Three 400 ml tubs of "Muscle Growth 4000 Weight Gain Formula - from zero to hero in just two weeks"
3 - A novelty hairy chest wig (which proved a hit with the ladies last new year's eve I can tell you!)
Please have the marker sent to:
c/o GoatBoy
Goatboy Enterprises
Virgin Meadows
Bill Hicksville
West Sussex
Cheers m8