I can beat them.....
Not christmassy at all, but funny......ish......
As a young boy, Joe was completely obsessed with tractors. He had pictures of tractors all over his bedroom walls; he had tractor toys, tractor T-shirts, a tractor carpet, and duvet cover, the whole works. He ate, drank and slept tractors. On his 17th birthday he was thrilled to get an invitation to go to a tractor factory nearby and test-drive a brand new tractor.
His excitement was incredible as he told his family and friends. The great day came and he went to the factory for the test-drive.
Unfortunately something went terribly wrong with the tractor when Joe was driving it and it flipped over, trapping and breaking Joe's leg and fracturing his skull. He was so upset and tried to sue the tractor company for negligence. But the company would have none of it and told there was no liability and he could get lost!
You can imagine he was very annoyed with tractors after this and vowed to shed them from his life completely and forever. All the posters came down, the toys were given away - tractors were GONE.
Many years later, Joe went into a bar for a drink. Inside, the cigarette and cigar smoke was terrible but through it he saw a beautiful girl seated at the bar on her own. Tears were streaming down her face. Joe asked her what was wrong and she said that the smoke was making her eyes sting and stream with tears. With that, Joe looked around and then took a huge breath, sucking in all the smoke. He then walked outside into the car park and blew all the smoke out again. He goes back into the bar where the air is now clear and sweet and sits down next to the girl. "That was amazing!" she said, "How did you do that?" "No problem", said Joe, ..
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> > "I'm an ex-tractor fan"
