You can use a 3000 bottle on a 4500 reg, or a 4500 bottle on a 3000 reg, as long as you only fill to the limit of the lower one, i.e. 3000psi.
It would be a good idea to put in the correct burst disc for 3000psi operation (about 5000psi?), as a 4500psi reg will probably come with a 7500psi burst disc, which is a bit high to protect a 3000psi bottle. Probably no major danger if you don't do this, but it's better to be safe than sorry, eh?